Hello cyber-world,

Do you ever get the feeling that everything is out of order, that nothing feels right? And then in your confusion God wraps his arms around you and though you still can't find anything, you feel at peace? ...

Yeah, me too.

I'm in the middle of a tour with the Josh Hiers Band and everyday I'm learning to become more selfless... It's just part of the natural process of being with a large group, or rather a community, for a long amount of time... I think that's how God intended things. More and more I'm learning to die to myself and to serve others.

I so often forget to die to myself with my family and friends back home... I figure that I do it so much here on the road that surely I don't need to be selfless with those I care about back home... But as you might figure, that couldn't be more wrong.

So, to those I have neglected to call, and to those that I have neglected to keep in touch with and to follow your lives and to love your lives, and to those that in our conversations and in our relationships I have put myself before you, when I put my feelings before yours... Please forgive me.

God is placing me on the potters wheel... He is refining me and shaping me until there's nothing left of me... until all you can see is God's reflection.

-Lance

If you want more insightful blogs that challenge your life visit a friend of mine's blog.

It's been awhile since I've blogged. You probably didn't even realize it, though, and that's what I'm counting on. A lot's changed, a lot hasn't changed (God really being the only thing haha), but I feel like I just need to write. Write what? you may ask. Good question! I wish I had the answer.

Sometimes I'm so good at giving out advice, but when it comes to using my own advice, I either am really good at making excuses or really just don't believe in my advice enough to use it.

I've been more desperate for God recently. I guess that's what usually happens when you pray for something haha. I've been praying for His eyes, and His heart, and to be hungry for His presence in my everyday life, and in my everyday situations. I want to feel Him in every conversation. And guess what? God came though. As usual. Why do I doubt so often?

My heart is heavy right now (which is probably why I'm writing all this nonsense), and I've looked forward to turmoil of the heart, and working through things, until it actually comes to doing it. But I can see dawn.

Anyway, I love you all. I love those of you that read this more;)

I promise to write more meaningful stuff next time.

My prayer for you: God, will you find whoever reads this and give them your eyes. To see what can't be seen. To be able to look past face value and into the spiritual. Give them your heart. A heart that burns for people. A heart that breaks for a generation that's conforming to what they see and not what they believe. May you find this person, and hold them in your arms, and let them know that everything will be ok. Let them lean against your chest, hear your heart beat, and feel their head rise and fall as your breathe in and out. God, would you wreck me! And if the person that reads this is willing, would you wreck them? Wreck us God!

On My Way Back To The Top

You know that place… That moment… Right before you fall asleep at night…

Where you’re not quite asleep, but you’re still not quite awake? And something scares you and you jump?

Whenever I find myself in that moment, it’s like a dream and I’m always laying down on the edge of a cliff…

And then I start to roll over the edge of the cliff, and before I find out what happens, my body jumps and I wake up…

Well… Sometimes I wanna go to the cliff and just fling my body off of the top of it…

Because I would rather jump and come crashing to the bottom, than to still be standing at the top, wondering... if I can fly.

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There are so any things I would've done/said differently... but it's okay, I'm with good company.

Merry Christmas!

Easy Heart

Easy Heart, stand firm.
Wait with arms strong,
sturdy, and out.

Easy Heart, stand firm.
Catch daisy's cousin
Don't let this flower fall in doubt.

Easy Heart.

You can Dance while you wait,
but don't close your eyes.

You can laugh while you wait,
but don't laugh with the sky.

You can Sing while you wait,
But don't croon about the spring.

My heart doesn't listen,
He smiles when he sings!

The Streak Continues

I've been getting hurt a lot lately. It started with my fixed gear bike (pictured top right. Ahhh I love her). She only has one gear and no brakes, so needless to say she plays rough. The first incident happened in Orlando. I was learning how to skid-stop in a parking garage when I lost balance and flipped the bike. I got pretty scrapped up. That was followed by many more "tanks" as Ryan Young likes to call them. A few days ago I went surfing. It was a pretty "mushy" day but it's too long of a drive to not get wet. I was in the water and was paddling in on this wave when I decided at the last second that I need to bail. I jumped off the board but it got caught in the wave, pulled tight on my leash, and then was flung in the air. It came flying down and slammed right into to my forehead. I couldn't tell how bad it was but I knew it hurt!! There was no one out there with me and no one on shore either. I was afraid I had a concussion and that I'd pass out in the water with no one around, so I road the next wave in on my stomach. Then two days ago I was (again) riding my bike late at night with a few friends (Ryan and Cono) when some young kids drove by us as about 50 mph honking there horn and yelling at us only to have to slam on their brakes for the stop sign 50 yards ahead of us. I thought the guys were gonna role through the stop sign but they decided to stop right next to the car that almost just ran over us to stare them down or something. But I wasn't paying attention and tried to skid to a stop but slid right into the back of Cono's bike and went head first over my bike and onto the pavement. I hyper-extended all my fingers on my left hand and was almost positive that I broke my left index finger. It turned out that it was just extremely inflamed or something. I couldn't really understand what the doctor was saying. (Walk-in clinic). Side note: I've never broken anything in my life (bone-wise) and was really upset when I thought that my finger was broken, but... The STREAK continues!

I'm going 100% after everything. I ride to0 fast on my bike. I surf too hard on my board. I take way too many classes at school. So, needless to say I've been failing a lot. But to be honest, I've never felt more alive in my life!

I've got one more thing that needs "failing," but I can't tell you what it is just yet!

Patience is a Virtue

Today was a good day!

I turned in all my homework!

I went on a 2 hour bike ride around downtown Lakeland. You'd be surprised at how many nooks and crannies Lakeland has.

I had dinner at Palace Pizza.

I hung out with some of the most amazing people in the world. Most of my favorite people.

I played on a jungle gym for an hour. I felt 10 years old again.

I played a giant game of "Capture the Flag" in the middle of the night in the middle of downtown Lakeland.

It was a pretty darn good day!

Sorry for the delay in blog posts. (Some care more than others. Thank you to those who keep me writing). About 2 months ago I found out that some people I never figured would even know what a blog was were reading my blog and it kind of caught me off guard. So, I took a little break from blogging and the little break turned into a sabbatical of sorts. But anyway. I'm back. Hello cyber space!

Who will drive the bus?

I never knew how much I crave companionship. My parents are gone. All my friends are resting from a long weekend of summerfest! And somebody is house sitting our dog. I never realized how big this house could feel and how alone I could feel.

And to nail it in: a great friend of mine has gone to Love with Jesus! It's been hard for me. If he were here he would wipe our tears and tell us to smile. And as hard as it is, I want to do what he would will. You will be missed.